For some reason I always, always have tons of stories about birds. I do not understand why. Birds and I just always have very weird encounters. My stories always seem to keep my friends laughing. I thought I would share them with the world and see if anybody else can be entertained by them. So with that little introduction, here are my stories.
This Means War
One of the very first stories that I can remember is when I got in the middle of a bird and squirrel fight! In high school I used to run a lot. While I was out on one of my runs, I saw a cute little squirrel. It was sitting under a tree that I was passing. Right as I passed that tree two crows swooped down and almost hit me. They were aiming for the squirrel! I was a little bit in shock as to what just happened so I stopped. All of the sudden the squirrel ran my way and the crows of course followed. They almost hit me again and I watched as the squirrel and birds fought in the street. It was a very terrifying experience!
It Rolled Over My Car!
This story is a very short story but was very weird nonetheless. I was just driving minding my own business. As I’m coming down a hill I see several birds in the air. I didn’t really think anything of it but saw that one of the birds was very close to my car. I wasn’t going to be able to do anything about it. The bird ended up hitting the top of my windshield and rolling over the roof of my car! I listened to it roll over the top of my car! My sister was in the car and is pretty sensitive about those kinds of things. I’m pretty sure it scarred her for life. I felt bad for that bird, but he could have moved.
I Hit Big Bird!
This story isn’t actually about big bird from sesame street and in reality he hit me. I am once again in my car stopped at a stop light. The light had just turned green. I was going maybe 5 mph because I had just started moving. All of the sudden this big yellow bird belly flopped on my windshield! I don’t know where that bird came from. The bird definitely ran into me because I was barely moving. The bird seemed ok. It ended up flying away. Hopefully it didn’t suffer too much damage. That bird was also very dirty. When it hit my car it left a bird shaped dirt mark on my windshield. I think that’s all my stories about birds involving a car.
Little Birds Are Stupid
This story is more like two stories put into one. My school has these tiny birds. I don’t know what kind of bird they are but they are pretty small. So for the first story I was walking back to my dorm after a 7 am class. I was not focusing on the ground. The only thing I was focusing on was getting back to my dorm to sleep. Normally birds move when you get close to them. Well, I’m walking and I felt myself step on something. I look down and it was one of these tiny birds! It didn’t move when I got close to it, and I unfortunately didn’t see it. This bird and I stared at each other for a good three minutes. This had never happened to me. I didn’t know what to do. We both ended up going about our business. I didn’t completely step on it and it seemed fine.
The next story is actually something that happened to someone else but I witnessed it. It also involved these tiny birds after a 7 am class. This girl was walking in front of me. One of these tiny birds flew into her leg. How does that even happen? What is with all these birds flying into things? One of my best friends also saw a bird fly into a window. That has nothing to do with this story though. The girl turns around to see if anybody else saw that. She looks at me and says, “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do!” Then we both just walked away.
Don’t Feed The Birds
It’s a pretty well known rule that you’re not supposed to feed wild animals. I understand why that is. Sometimes I forget things like that and make mistakes. I was sitting outside a restaurant eating a chicken burrito. There were several little birds hopping around probably looking for something to eat. So being the stupid college student I am, I threw them a piece of chicken. First off, that’s kind of cannibalism! Second off, I did not realize they would fight over the piece of chicken. A bunch of birds flew around the corner and started chasing this one bird who had the chicken. I felt so bad for that little bird! I now will never feed the birds again.
Animal Cruelty Is Not Ok
For my last bird story I will share something that I witnessed. I was on vacation in California for my best friend’s wedding. Our hotel was right next to the beach. We decided to go walk the pier. Everything was normal just a bunch of water and sand. There were also a lot of pelicans which terrify me. They’re very scary birds. Because I am so scared of those birds, I was being paranoid and looking around. I turned around and saw a little boy kick a bird! He full on walked up to this bird and kicked it like a soccer ball. He seemed very little so he probably didn’t quite realize how horrible that was. The father did get after him though. I have never seen that before and I was stunned for a little bit.
Well, that’s all of my bird stories that I am going to share for now. I don’t understand why I have so many weird encounters with birds. I kind of hope to have more to add to my collection. So if you happen to be reading this, I hope you were entertained as much as I was.